Well this isn't working...

I tried to go to work today when I was already in pain. I had taken a Lortab and was starting to feel better when I left, but the activity of just walking into the building made it so much worse that by the time I made it to my meeting, all I wanted to do was lie down. I called Mike and had him come get me. Every bump in the road on the way home resonated in my skull. I slept for a few hours and felt better (pain not gone though, its never really gone just resting). It is starting to come back again now and I just don't think I want to try and handle that again twice in one day. If this does not improve, I will run out of Lortabs before I can refill the prescription though.

I am trying to write a paper that was due last night. I'd like to say that I am not getting anywhere because of the pain, but it is really because I am a world-class procrastinator. If they ever give gold medals in putting things off, I will be in strong contention. Three classes in and I am hating this going back to school thing. But I have already spent the money, I am getting the damn degree if I have to kill for it.

Thoughts about pain...

There hasn't been a day since about mid-October in which I haven't had intense sinus pain. Yesterday, I saw myself in the mirror and I was so pale my lips were white. My nose, teeth, cheeks, forehead, and skull all have this crushing pain that makes my thighs feel weak and shaky. As an added bonus, I get waves of nausea that sometime even come in my sleep. I had been rationing my Lortab because I don't want to use too much but my doctor told me to knock that shit off and start taking them at least twice a day. Frankly, I don't even know if that is helping get a handle on it. It makes it so I can function. I haven't called in sick in months. I just put my head down, grit my teeth and go on. Mike worries about me, but I always tell him that pain never killed anyone (makes you want to die but doesn't kill you). Yesterday, I thought maybe hiding in the closet would be good but the pain would just follow me in if I did that. Isn't it odd that severe pain makes you want to hide? Like that would really help. The psyche is an odd thing.

This morning the pain wasn't too bad yet and I hadn't been to the gym since October so I figured what the hell and gave it a shot. I took a preemptive Lortab and headed for water aerobics. I made it through about 45 minutes of the class before the urge to throw up made me get out of the pool. I'm quite proud of myself and my muscles feel great! Plus I love being the smallest one in the pool!

Joint Commission

My new job heavily involves being ready to pass accreditation of various approval bodies. The major one is The Joint Commission which used to be called JCAHO. I am recovering from their visit last week. I spent most of my days shadowing one of the surveyors and writing down my observations and whatever questions he asked so we may make sure we cover everything in which they are focusing. I would come in every morning by 0700 and leave around 5-6 P.M. From the inside, we thought we would not pass because we know what issues which still need work. The surveyors from the outside were so overwhelmingly impressed with the fine institution I have called home since 1989, that they did not really ask the hard questions we ask of ourselves. They called us a "first class academic institution which clearly cares about patient safety". I have always been very proud of where I work and what I do, but I was doubly proud to hear how great we are from outside inspectors.

Perception

Yesterday, I was in Office Depot trying to decide upon a new printer when a woman went past me in the aisle and commented that "your purse is bigger than you are". Now this is not a very big purse and it is one I love and spent more than I have ever spent on a purse for. So, I very naturally took it as a compliment to my size. I decided she was saying that I was small. So I thanked her. Her response, "uh huh".

Life update

I've started back to school. I got my Bachelor's degree in nursing at University of Phoenix online. It was a lot of work, writing a lot of papers. My writing skills certainly improved, but I write like an academic which can be less than entertaining. Anyway, I decided to go for my Masters in Healthcare Administration. Oddly enough, the writing skills of the people in my classes are not as good as the ones at the bachelors level. In fact, some of the drive me crazy with poor word usage but I think I see improvement as the classes go by. Anyway, that is why I haven't been blogging. I've just been too busy.
I also changed jobs. I am still at the University Health Care System but now I work in Quality and Patient Safety. I have a lot to learn. I am also trying to get used to working five day weeks. Two days off isn't nearly enough!
Mike and I are in a campground in Wendover. We decided to take a few days off. I need to rest and gamble. I have also had about a month of intense, nauseating sinus pain. I guess I couldn't possible too stressed; I started a new job, going back to school, and intense daily pain.

British Television

I've gotten hooked on BBC America. Mike and I love Dr. Who and Torchwood. This summer's Jekyll had us on the edge of the couch. For some odd reason, I love to watch How Clean is Your House and You Are What You Eat. Sometimes I can't understand a word people say, but I love their attitude. British housecleaning and nutrition shows seem to be working, however. My house is the cleanest its been in years and I am cooking healthy most nights. Although I am not going to do that seriously vegie filled crap Jillian the nutrition-Nazi make people eat!

Hot for teacher

I suck at this blogging thing. I get lazy and don't write. Although I guess I have a pretty good excuse. I am back in school and writing my ass off. I got 100% on my first paper. My teacher wrote, "Outstanding conceptualization, content, structure, flow and scholarship". At my age you would think I wouldn't get excited by comments like that but I had to show Mike how wonderful my teacher thinks I am. ;-)

I am starting my new job next Monday. I have been hired as a Quality Improvement Specialist for medication management and oncology. It looks like a lot of work and a lot of fun. There is a lot of geeky numbers, spreadsheets, and graphs. It may just be the job I didn't know I was looking for.